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January 19, 2001, 8:04 p.m. || nervous and nail-biting

It's hard to teach a class (as the graduate student instructor or teacher's assistant) when the professor gives little indication of her intentions or agenda. It doesn't help when a day before the semester starts --no, the night before-- she calls to say, "I'm working on the syllabus right now." I think of all the work I put into my syllabi (a process of teasing out threads of inquiry, a critical mapping of a field and its arguments) and the simply practical considerations (the copy stores are jam-packed with orders) and I bite my tongue.

I'm nervous and nail-biting.

Today being the first day of discussion section I offered a brief outline, improvising a short list of "issues" central to an introduction to women's studies class: 1) what is gender? 2) why is gender not a discrete political category apart from race, class, sexuality, or geopolitics? and 3) what counts as "natural" or "normal" or "common sense," and why? It's a simplistic distillation, but I'm not working with a lot. (Do I even have a set of the readings for next Monday? No, they haven't been decided yet.)

My outline led students in each section to different questions -- about the nature of the sex/gender distinction, about the gendered politics of pop culture and its consumption. One or two students posed wildly complicated questions which I wanted to address, but couldn't because 1) I didn't want section to be a fifteen-minute dialogue between myself and the one or two students doing the asking and 2) there was so much theroetical disentangling involved in answering their questions that there was no way I could possibly do much but muddy the waters further. (Especially for the students for whom the idea that "gender is a social construct" is completely new -- it's not good to lose half the class the first day.)

How do you adequately respond to, "Well, how do people consume a film like What Women Want? Do they really think that what's in this film is what women think about? How much about this do they really believe?" Reams and reams of books have been written about the politics of audience reception and consumption, hegemonic culture and its negotiation, is there an easy capsule formula for explaining this? Oof.

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In the last week I've had two great conversations with two great activists about radical pedagogy --one working around anti-racist organizing in the anti-globalization movement and the other involved in community development and living wage campaigns. Three cheers for being inspired.